One Day to Say I Love You
by Spunky0ne
Summary: It was love that never had a chance to be, ended before it began by the death of one who was not supposed to die. The usurper King Aizen will allow the seeds of that love to be sown to finally secure the right to openly be king. But one mistake gives Byak
1. Prayer for the Lost

**One Day to Say I Love You**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

**Chapter 1: Prayer for the Lost**

The entry guards at the gates to Kuchiki Manor nodded briefly in greeting as Renji Abarai approached them, then was waved through without hesitation. He smiled as Tetsuya Kuchiki stepped onto the walkway ahead of him, and moved forward, extending a hand in greeting.

"Captain Abarai," the noble said solemnly, "Welcome."

Renji smiled, albeit a bit sadly at Tetsuya, unable to miss the newly crafted serpentine kenseiken that decorated the young man's wavy black hair, the sadness beneath the usually lively blue eyes and the newly crafted pale blue silken scarf that graced his friend's slender shoulders.

It seemed strange for Tetsuya to be so formal with him, but then, as the recently elected leader of the Kuchiki Clan, the young man had, Renji thought, some very large shoes to fill.

"How is Rukia?" Renji asked, as Tetsuya turned back and led him towards the gardens.

Tetsuya considered the question for a moment, breathing in the sweet scents of the flowers as they made their way down the wooden walkway.

"As well as can be expected, I suppose," he answered finally, "She goes to visit them every day. She tries to bury herself in her work at the thirteenth, but it is very difficult for her...losing her brother as she did."

Renji paused as they reached the end of the walkway.

"And how about you?" the redhead asked, "You handling those stuffy old men okay? If they're annoying you, I can go and kick them around a little."

Tetsuya managed a soft chuckle and his eyes cheered slightly.

"I am fine, Renji. Byakuya prepared me well for this. It is a fact that many of the heads of our clan died young. It is only that Byakuya was the most powerful leader in our history that made it strange. But then, everything about that day was strange."

"Yeah," agreed the redhead, "Everything."

Tetsuya took a soft breath and nodded in the direction of the back gate.

"Go on, then," he said quietly, "I will have tea with you, here in the gardens when you return."

"Sure thing," Renji agreed, stepping down off of the walkway and leaving the young clan leader behind.

He walked slowly through the gardens, still hearing the echoes of his late captain's voice in his mind, replaying the numerous times he had stood in these same gardens, surrounded by blooming flowers, large koi ponds and sakura and plum trees, breathing in the sweet air and feeling the same warmth of the sun.

But somehow the sun just couldn't fill him with the same warmth as it had before.

_It's never going to be the same again. I'll never hear that voice again, just echoes in my memory. I'll never see his beautiful face, looking so intent as he works just across the room from me. I won't feel that strong reiatsu, that felt like it could eat me alive. And I'll never feel those pretty pink blades cut into my flesh while we spar. All of that is gone._

_If I say that to myself enough times, will it finally begin to sink in that it's real?_

He came to a fork in the trail and turned left towards the barn and the family cemetery. A few steps later, he heard the sound of equine hooves on the path and felt a touch on his shoulder. It felt good to be able to yield a smile to the tall, black Arabian stallion as he turned.

"Hey there, Fleabag," he greeted Tetsuya's horse, "What're you doing sneaking up on people? Up to no good, eh?"

Arashi let out a huff of sweet, hay-scented breath and nipped the hair tie out of his hair and watching in amusement as the redhead's long mane tumbled down in a crimson heap onto his shoulders and back.

"Baka!" he said reproachfully, reaching out to take it back.

Arashi snorted and raised his head high in the air, holding the hair tie out of Renji's reach.

"Hey, quit that, will you?" Renji complained, "I'm not in the mood to play right now."

The stallion made a sound of annoyance and tossed his head, releasing the hair tie and watching as it flew upward, then fluttered down and snagged up in the high branches of a sakura tree.

"Nice move, dumbass," Renji muttered, shaking his head, "Get outta here, okay? I'm just here to see Byakuya."

He paused a moment, biting at his lips.

"I'm here to _visit_ Byakuya," he corrected himself, "Go and pick on your master."

Arashi's sapphire eyes softened and he let out a more sympathetic nicker. Renji sank the fingers of one hand into the horse's silken mane and couldn't help but feel a bit better as the stallion brushed his soft muzzle against the redhead's cheek.

"Oh no, kissing up to me won't get you anywhere," he said half-heartedly, "Scram, you. I've got stuff to do."

Arashi nodded and nudged him, then turned and trotted back in the direction of the barn. Renji chuckled to himself, glad for the brief respite from the dark feelings, and then continued on his way.

The trail wound through several groves of sakura, peach and plum before coming to an end at the verdant expanse of the family cemetery. Renji opened the gate and passed through, closing it behind him. He walked slowly across the grass to a freshly erected, black granite headstone that bore his late captain's name, and the dates of his birth and death. He whispered the elegantly styled inscription, instantly liking the words that Tetsuya had chosen.

"_Even if I scatter, never to bloom again, I scatter like a flame. Beautifully_."

He bowed his head and closed his eyes.

"Hi Captain," he began, then he paused as the wind caught his haori, making it billow softly in the breeze, "Well, maybe you're not technically my captain anymore, but that's how I'll always think of you. Things are going okay, over at the sixth. We lost a lot of guys in the war, but there are some new recruits coming in that are looking real good. Rikichi came through things very well. He's my vice captain."

Renji chuckled softly.

"He still can't manage the hell butterflies for shit, but he's good in a fight. He does a lot of stuff I remember you teaching the guys at the division. He really looked up to you. I mean, I may have been his idol, and maybe I still am, but you were the one who actually taught the kid something. And what you taught the guys helped a lot of them to survive. So don't feel bad about what happened that last day. We were really screwed over. We went into that fight with As Nodt with bad information that was just bad enough to get you killed. But...ah...I got him. Thanks to the Royal Guard, I got some help and fixed my bankai After we figured out the medallions, I took him on."

He smiled as he heard Byakuya's voice sound in his mind.

"Yeah, yeah, I took Rikichi as backup. Rukia assisted too, but don't worry. I watched out for her. I wasn't going to let her get hurt. Death wouldn't be enough to keep you from killing me if I let anything happen to her, right?"

He felt tears rise in his eyes and sniffed softly.

"Captain, there's...something I need to tell you. It's something that I wanted to tell you for a long time, but I couldn't. It seems stupid now, but I didn't want to make waves, you know? You wanted to avoid breaking the rules of your clan again, and I didn't have the heart to put you between me and them. But, I guess it's safe to say the words now."

He paused and brushed several tears off of his cheeks.

"I...I wanted to tell you that...I love you, Captain," he said, the last words ending in a soft sob, "I should have said something sooner, maybe, but...I didn't think it was right. Now, I don't know what to think. It feels awful, thinking of what we missed because I was too scared to tell you. And...if I had just one more day, I would do things so different! It might not save your life, but it would have given us that time together. I mean, if you could have loved me back, it would have been so beautiful to love you, even if we had to keep that love a secret. I can't take it back now. I would if I could. And even if it was just for one more day, I would fill that day with everything we missed. And I couldn't have regrets after that. I love you. I really do love you. And I wish with all of my heart that you could hear me say that, just this once."

He went on, barely aware of what words he said next, only registering the last words of parting and a final confession of love.

Renji sucked in a surprised breath and stared as a warm hand touched his shoulder and turned him slowly around.

XXXXXXXXXX

"What are you doing?" the soul king asked, his strange eyes sending a chill through Byakuya as he leaned forward and turned off the viewing screen he had been watching.

"I am sorry," the noble said, bowing his head and closing his eyes, "I know it is wrong, but he was...special to me."

The king smiled, sliding onto the large bed and coaxing Byakuya into his arms. The raven-haired man tried not to flinch as they wrapped around him and the king's cool lips touched his throat.

"I am...trying to adjust, but it is difficult."

"I know," said the king, "I did not expect that your transition would be easy, and I am pleased at your heartfelt attempt to move forward. But you should not feel guilt over missing what you had to leave behind. Although, I must admit that I find it odd that you seem to miss your vice captain as much as you miss your own sister."

"You know that Renji was more than a vice captain to me. I loved him."

"But you never told him that," whispered the king.

"It would have been wrong," Byakuya said softly, "I promised to obey the rules of my family and to yield to the will of my king. That is my duty, however difficult it may be."

"Yes," said the king, claiming Byakuya's lips for a long, gentle kiss, "You are a very dedicated servant."

He slid a hand down the open front of Byakuya's white, silken yukata, caressing his privates for a moment, then seeking his recently plundered entrance.

"And soon, you will give your king the greatest of gifts. But...as you have been so gracious and obedient, despite having to give up everything to serve me, perhaps I can offer you something in return. What would you ask of me, Byakuya?"

Unexpectedly, the viewing screen flicked on behind the noble and Renji's voice issued softly from the speaker, the words making his former captain's fill with tears.

_"I...I wanted to tell you that...I love you, Captain," he said, the last words ending in a soft sob, "I should have said something sooner, maybe, but...I didn't think it was right. Now, I don't know what to think. It feels awful, thinking of what we missed because I was too scared to tell you. And...if I had just one more day, I would do things so different! It might not save your life, but it would have given us that time together. I mean, if you could have loved me back, it would have been so beautiful to love you, even if we had to keep that love a secret. I can't take it back now. I would if I could. And even if it was just for one more day, I would fill that day with everything we missed. And I couldn't have regrets after that. I love you. I really do love you. And I wish with all of my heart that you could hear me say that, just this once."_

The soul king smiled, sending a jolt of surprise through the noble.

"What a lovely sentiment," the monarch said kindly.

"My apologies," Byakuya said quickly, "I...wasn't aware that Renji returned my feelings."

He turned to look where Renji's image had frozen upon the screen.

"He is right about one thing," the noble went on, "We wasted an opportunity, worrying about what now seem like trivial things. In the face of true love, minor rule breaking no longer seems like the right reason to abstain from it."

"I agree," said the king, surprising Byakuya again, "But do not despair, Byakuya. I have tremendous powers, and I am in your debt for the gift you will give me."

The king's fingers stroked one damp, pale cheek as he considered.

"Go then," he said softly, the words sending an odd shiver down the noble's spine.

"Gomen nasai?" Byakuya said uncertainly.

"I want you to return to the man you love," said the king, "Spend twenty-four hours with him, however you will, and then return to me."

"M-my lord?"

"Yes, I meant that you may do _anything_, Byakuya. You have my permission. Go on."

"But..."

"You wonder at my generosity in allowing you to be unfaithful, now that we are wed? It is not so hard to understand. I required you to give up everything to come here and serve me. But...in doing so, I did not give you time for proper closure. So, I will give you that time now. Go, my love. Go to Renji Abarai and make things right...so that both he and you will then move on."

Byakuya stared at the monarch for a moment longer, then felt things go strangely hazy around him. He felt the sensation of falling, and closed his eyes tightly, quivering inwardly at the frightening feeling. The motion stopped suddenly, and he found himself standing on the trail, just outside the Kuchiki family cemetery. His heart skipped painfully as his eyes found Renji standing at his graveside, tears streaming down his face.

_Listen carefully, _the king's voice said in his mind, _You have but twenty-four hours to spend with that man. Use the time wisely. Do not tell him where you have been, or how you came to return. Only speak your love for him and let things take their course. No one but Renji Abarai will be able to see or sense you. You will exist only to that man. And when the given time ends, you will be brought back to me, and you will let this be the end of your reflections on the past._

Byakuya shivered as a breath of sakura touched his senses, and as a few stray petals tickled his skin. He swallowed hard and moved forward, slowly opening the cemetery gate and stepping inside. He closed the gate quietly and proceeded slowly across the grass, his eyes on Renji's back, and his long, unbound hair that flowed beautifully on the breezes.

_I don't know what to say._

So, he listened, instead, hanging on every word as the redhead continued.

"I'm gonna take care of the people that mattered to you...Rukia, Tetsuya, the guys at the division. I'll watch out for them, the way you would. It's no burden to me. I love them too. Look, I don't know if I'll be able to come back here again. This is...really hard, and I know that you wouldn't want me to dwell on things too much. I have to let go. But don't forget...never forget...how much...I love you!"

Unable to stop himself, Byakuya reached out with one slender hand and brought it to rest on Renji's shoulder.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Well," said Gin, smiling at the soul king, "That worked out well for you, didn't it? Just as you thought, Byakuya revealed him to you."

"I never had a doubt that he would," said the monarch, "Byakuya is devoted to his king. That man will do _anything_ for me, even die."

"Only as long as he doesn't see through the illusions. As long as Renji Abarai doesn't."

"Neither of them will 'see through' anything, until it is too late."

"Oh, you're not going to kill them, are you? After all they are doing for you, Sousuke? That's not very nice."

"Be careful of your words, Gin," the king warned him, "I revived you when you were about to die. I saved you. I can undo that at any time."

"Yes, but you so enjoy my humor."

"I do," agreed Aizen, "Levity is a good thing. Otherwise, things become too dreary."

"Hmmm," muttered Gin, "So, what happens now? Byakuya revealed the hidden heir, so..."

"So, now they will make a child together. And Byakuya will bring that child back to me. When he is born, I will devour him, and once I do, the line of kings will become a part of me. I will be able to use all of the royal powers. I won't need illusion anymore. It will all be a reality!"

"But what if Renji Abarai gets wise to what you have done? What then? He could find out who he is and..."

"No," said Aizen, his eyes glinting softly, "Renji isn't going to be a problem...because as soon as Byakuya leaves Soul Society to return to me, Renji Abarai is going to die. He will never even know what killed him."


	2. Hand of Sorrow

**Chapter 2: Hand of Sorrow**

**(I was listening to Hand of Sorrow by Within Temptation while writing this and thought it was fitting, considering Byakuya's situation. Thanks so much to everyone reading, and especially to lovely reviewers Bre 42 (You've got it!), DragonPrincess01 (I'm sure Renji will feel the same soon!), Renji-Bya-Lover (Yup, things will clear up soon. I will write fast!), CallMeSenseiKuchiki (Yup, 'bad boy' Aizen is at his tricks again! But things won't go exactly as he planned...) and DeviWan (Here's some more to devour!)**

"Renji..."

_It's gotta be a trick of the light._

_It's just Tetsuya and my mind wants to see Byakuya, so it's..._

But even when he blinked and looked again, even when he touched the man's face to be sure, the image before him and the strong, familiar reiatsu remained the same. Renji's mouth dropped open and his body went weak as Byakuya stepped into his arms and embraced him tightly, burying his face in the crimson hair that rested on Renji's shoulder.

"Captain?" Renji whispered, not daring to believe what all of his senses were telling him.

_Gods, I've really lost it, because it can't be! His body was found and he was cremated and buried! I was unconscious, but Rikichi identified him positively. This...can't be!_

But despite the logic he tried to fall back on, Renji couldn't deny the wonderful, strong reiatsu that burned against his, the pale, perfect skin and soft, silken black hair, _everything_! He held on tightly, closing his eyes for fear that the man would disappear again.

"Byakuya!" he breathed helplessly, "Oh my kami, where have you been! You are...really here, ne? I'm not losing it? What happened? Why? Tell me what's going on, please!"

Byakuya lifted his head from Renji's shoulder and looked into the man's teary, red-brown eyes.

"I...cannot explain," he whispered, "I was gone from you, but you asked for one more day, and it has been granted."

Renji's eyes narrowed as he tried to make sense of the words.

"Wait," he said, shaking his head, "Wait a second, you weren't killed? Then, what did happen to you? Where did you go? Why did you let all of us think you were dead?"

Byakuya swallowed hard and wiped the tears from Renji's tanned cheeks.

"Renji, please don't ask me any more questions. We only have a short time. Come with me. We need to talk."

"You can say that again!" exclaimed the stunned redhead, "Okay, this is getting, really weird. What's going on? Is this just me having a nervous breakdown or something? Have I cracked up and I'm living in a fantasy world, or some shit like that?"

"Why does that matter?" Byakuya asked softly, "Renji, we have only been given a short time to make peace with the way things are. So, please come with me to where we can talk alone."

"What about Rukia? Tetsuya? Everyone else? Don't you want to see them too?"

"I cannot be seen by them," Byakuya explained, "I can only be perceived by you."

"Oh!" Renji said weakly, "Shit, I am losing it!"

"You are not 'losing it,' Renji," the noble insisted, "I am here. This is real. But we must go now. Come with me."

Byakuya slipped a hand into Renji's and he led the younger man out of the cemetery and onto the trail. They passed the sakura grove, where Renji's hair tie still rested up in one of the trees, then continued back to the fork in the road, where Byakuya turned them away from the manor, and instead led him through more rows of blooming trees, to the top of a cliff, beside a huge waterfall, then down the cliff face, over a rippling lake and into a green meadow. Renji looked all around, touched and smelled and tried to convince himself that it wasn't really happening. But everything remained the same around him, and if it was an illusion, it was so perfect that he could not break through it. He held onto Byakuya's hand tightly, scared to death that, at any moment, the lovely daydream he was having would end, and he would end up finding himself waking up in the cemetery.

But Byakuya did not disappear. He remained at Renji's side, leading him quietly across the large meadow, into a stand of evergreen, up a long, rocky hillside, to a cabin that overlooked another, smaller lake.

"Where are we?" he asked the noble, "What is this place?"

Byakuya paused and looked back at him.

"It is a cabin near the manor that Tetsuya and I have used on occasion to get away from things. I thought it would be a good place for us to talk."

Renji felt an odd shiver pass through him.

"Okay," he said uncertainly.

_Well, whether this is real or not, there are things we need to say to each other._

Byakuya led him to the cabin door, then inside, where he turned back and closed the door behind them.

Neither man noticed the lovely blue equine eyes that watched from the nearby trees.

The two men stopped, just inside the cabin, staring into each others' eyes and wondering what to do next. Then, Byakuya sought Renji's strong embrace again, and they stood still for several minutes, just holding each other.

Byakuya breathed in Renji's warm, masculine scent, unable to hold back tears as the soft, red hair touched his face, and the skin of his throat. Finally, Renji's hands captured the noble's face, and their eyes met again.

"I don't understand," he whispered, shaking his head as more tears ran down his face, "What's happening, Captain? Why did you go? And why can't anyone see you but me? Why do you have to leave again? Please, just...tell me what's going on!"

Byakuya met his eyes cautiously.

"I told you, Renji," he said softly, his hands covering the redhead's where they touched his face, "I cannot tell you any more than I already have. The simple facts are as I said. I am here for twenty-four hours. Only you can see me. I heard what you said at my graveside, and that is why I came back."

"You...heard that?" Renji asked, blushing, "How? Where were you?"

"It doesn't matter," Byakuya said, taking Renji's hands from his face and holding them tightly, "All that matters is that, I wanted you to know...I...feel the same."

Renji stared at him in surprise.

"You...do?" he asked weakly.

_Okay, this is definitely a dream. But it's one hell of a beautiful dream and I really, really need this right now!_

Renji's already wobbly legs turned to jell-o as Byakuya's lovely face came closer to his, and the sweet scent of sakura fell over his senses.

_Shit, I've never had a dream so real, where everything, sights, smells, sounds and tastes, touches, were so perfect! What the hell is..._

His thoughts evaporated as Byakuya's soft lips found his and pressed firmly against them, stealing his breath away. The noble's body pushed up against his, sending electric jolts all through him as they continued to exchange, deep, desperate kisses.

"I can't believe this is happening," Renji whispered between kisses, "It feels like it's real, you know? But, how can it be?"

"It is what we need," Byakuya replied softly, "It is what we didn't do before that we should have!"

"I'm sorry!" Renji apologized, fresh tears filling his eyes, "I should have told you! I just didn't think there was any way that you would, you know, _love _me back."

"But, I did," Byakuya insisted, "I was just so stubborn about duty and honoring the clan's rules, that I forgot that sometimes love defies the rules. But even though it does, true love is divine. And it is a much greater sin to deny it. So, I won't deny it, not to myself or to you. I love you, Renji, and before I have to leave, I am going to show that to you!"

"But why do you have to go?" Renji asked desperately, "If you love me, then why won't you stay here with me? Or take me with you! Wherever it is, I'll go with you!"

Byakuya rubbed a damp cheek up against the redhead's.

"I know that you would. But it is not allowed. Renji, all we have is this one day. Let us not waste it!"

Despite his longing to continue questioning, Renji left off as Byakuya's mouth sought his again. He ran his tongue along the noble's soft lips, seeking entrance that was granted a moment later with a soft, sweetly erotic sigh. Byakuya settled in his arms, sinking wholeheartedly into every, long, wet kiss. He moaned lightly as Renji's hands slid down his body, enjoying the feel of the fine silk yukata he wore. His fingertips found the tie at Byakuya's waist, pulled it free slowly, then slipped his hands beneath it to caress the warm, sweat misted body beneath it.

The redhead paused for a moment, blinking hazedly as a familiar scent and reiatsu touched his senses for just a moment. He wondered where he had encountered it before, then had his thoughts derailed again as Byakuya swiftly undressed him. They stood, naked and pressed up against each other, savoring each long, hot kiss, before making their way to the bed, where Byakuya fell onto his back, bringing the redhead down with him. Renji gave in easily, wanting only to sink further into that beautiful, soft body and disappear.

_This is gonna hurt tomorrow, but I won't think about that. For once, I'm just gonna live in the moment. This is what I dreamed of, and now it feels so real! Dream or reality, I'm giving in to it. And even if it's only for one day, I'm going to hang on to it._

He paused again, gazing down at Byakuya's pale, pretty face and wide, affectionate eyes. He caught again, that slight hint of familiar reiatsu, but couldn't place it.

_It doesn't matter._

_All that matters is that we are here, now, and we are in love with each other. Nothing else matters but that!_

He attacked the noble's mouth hungrily, no longer holding back, but pouring everything he felt for the other man into each long, penetrating kiss, each longing touch and passionate caress. Byakuya responded in kind, for once, abandoning all else and giving everything to the red haired man he had come to love above all others.

Renji's fingers slid down between the noble's creamy thighs, but Byakuya shifted and rolled him onto his back. The redhead stared at the sweet, angelic vision of Byakuya poised above him, reaching down to position him, then bringing their bodies together.

Neither man could hold back any longer. They met in wild, heavy thrusts, their mouths feeding almost viciously on each other. Renji's hands found Byakuya's hips and held on, encouraging them as they performed an erotic dance atop the redhead's body. Byakuya's hands gripped Renji's shoulders painfully tightly, his pearly nails digging in even deeper as the heady sensations of their lovemaking overwhelmed him. The noble groaned as Renji went still, panting hard against his throat as he released, leaving the two men a sweaty, breathless heap on the bed.

They wanted to sleep in each others' arms, but didn't dare close their eyes. Instead, they rested quietly, sharing gentler kisses and touching each other all over. Renji left the bed briefly to make them some tea, then returned to the bed, where they drank it together, then surrendered to their passions again. Time disappeared into a haze of heated joinings, separated by time spent on slower explorations. They spoke little, relying on touch and caress to speak their words for them. Neither left the little cabin that was their refuge, and neither spoke of the looming deadline ahead of them.

But as time passed and that end grew closer, Byakuya saw the desperation mounting in the redhead's eyes. He knew better than to expect that Renji would let him walk away, and so as time wound down, he invoked a gentle sleep kido, then watched, gazing down into the redhead's eyes as he drifted off.

_I love you. I will always love you,_ he told Renji repeatedly, waiting until he was soundly asleep, then holding him tightly and surrendering to tears.

_I don't want to go, but I have to. I am grateful for the time we had. I am glad that we finally said the words and gave in to this. I have no regrets, except that this must be the end for us._

_I will love you forever and when I bear the king's child, in my heart, it will be ours, Renji._

_Sleep well._

_Be safe._

_And when you are lonely, remember this beautiful dream we shared._

_I will._

"Byakuya."

The noble froze at the sound of the king's voice. He didn't want to leave Renji's side, but he knew well that it would do no good to plead. He left Renji sleeping and took the king's hand, leaving the bed he had shared with Renji and feeling the warmth of their encounter swiftly fading. The king's hand touched his face, mercifully inducing sleep as he gathered the noble into his arms.

He opened a doorway into the spirit dimension, then stood for a moment, looking back at the redhead, who laid sleeping on the bed. He carried Byakuya through the open doorway, looking back once more and sending a flicker of fire back into the cabin. The fire caught and spread quickly, blocking off the sleeping man's escape and filling the air around him with thick smoke.

On the bed, Renji's eyes opened and filled with fear.

"Byakuya!" he cried, looking around.

All he saw was a huge swell of flame and thick, choking smoke. He rolled onto the floor and crawled towards the door, only to be forced back by a seething flare of fire.

"Oh my god!" he gasped, coughing as he sought any means of escape.

But the fire was closing in all around him, and the air had disappeared. Renji heard the scream of a horse somewhere nearby, then felt a swell of bankai level power.

"A-arashi?" he panted, his body collapsing in a heap as the fire reached him.

Everything began to disappear into the heat and smoke. And desperately, Renji grabbed on to the one thing that meant the most to him. He held on tightly to the memory of being with Byakuya as the world seemed to explode all around him in a sea of whiteness.

_So this is what it's like to die, _he thought dazedly.

He heard Arashi's desperate cry again, then sank down into the whiteness and let himself disappear.

XXXXXXXXXX

Byakuya woke to find himself back in the king's palace. His body had been carefully bathed and his clothing changed, so that no trace of Renji's scent or essence remained. He ached at the suddenness with which that time with the man he loved had disappeared, but he dared not think too firmly upon it. He opened his eyes and found the king looking down at him with affectionate eyes.

But as always, he felt something disturbing beneath that calm, gentle surface.

_I will adjust to this. He said that it would just take time. He was kind and gave me the chance to make things right with Renji. He has been terribly patient while I have come to terms with leaving everything behind. I don't think it's right to blame him for something that he had no part in deciding. The king's prism identified me as his consort, and that makes it my duty to serve him, and to bear the next king. He is as much a pawn in this as I am, and he is the king._

_There is nothing left to do. And there is no point in resisting. The past is behind me. I have to let it go._

The king's face came closer, and a fingertip brushed away the last trace of the tears he had shed.

"Are you all right now?" the monarch asked kindly.

"I will be," Byakuya said, calm returning to his mind, "And I am grateful to you. It must have been difficult letting me go back there to be with him like that."

The king smiled, but strangely, Byakuya could not feel the warmth in it.

"It is all right. You and I were not asked how we felt about this union. We were both guided by the wisdom of the souls within the king's prism. We both have to adjust. But...it is good to see you are accepting this with such grace. And I promise you. Though your arms feel empty without that man, they will be filled with our children. You will find happiness here as the past disappears behind you. But sleep for a while, my love. Let rest begin your healing. I will be here when you wake and we can take our first steps into this unplanned future. Sleep, Byakuya. Let everything fall away."

Despite his sadness, Byakuya found hope in the king's words. He embraced them as sleep overtook him. The king watched until he was sure that the noble was asleep, then left the bed and walked out to meet an approaching guardsman.

"Is it done?" he asked quietly.

"The cabin was engulfed in flame and we didn't sense his reiatsu anymore," the guardsman reported, "Renji Abarai is dead."

"Good," the king said, smiling, "You are dismissed."


	3. Paradise

**Chapter 3: Paradise**

Byakuya woke to find himself alone in the royal suite, spread out on the bed, with his head turned to see through the open balcony doors and out into the king's gardens. Soft breezes carried the sounds of running water in a nearby stream, and left the air around him freshened with the scents of flowers and grass. It would have had him feeling relaxed and contented if he had been lying in his bedroom at Kuchiki Manor, but here, only seemed to worsen his melancholy.

He knew better than to surrender to tears again. The king's patience, to this point had been remarkable, but even he had not limitless patience. And Byakuya expected that if he sensed that the noble's sadness had not lessened for having been given the ability to go back and find closure, he might begin to truly feel insulted.

And one, he thought, should really not insult a god.

Renji was still alive and he was carrying on without his former captain and love. All that was left was for Byakuya to give up and to do the same. Still, he had a deep longing just to use the special monitor that the king had allowed him to use before to look down and make sure that Renji was coping well enough. But after their twenty-four hours together, the monitor had been removed from the royal suite. The king hadn't made mention of it, and Byakuya didn't have to ponder too hard to figure out the meaning of the gesture.

He sat up in the bed and looked around, surprised that upon him waking, his attendant hadn't instantly appeared with tea and breakfast. It seemed that he did nothing that wasn't seen by somebody. And that made him wonder if perhaps there was some reason for the close monitoring. At first, he attributed it to being in a position close to the king. He had not chosen to be consort, so he might have had instincts to run or to hurt the monarch. In reality, neither had been a temptation to him. He was devoted to his family and would not have dishonored them in either manner. While it was true that he did not love the king, he was committed to making their union pleasant. And to that end, he had shown perfect obedience.

Even when the soul king had made him surrender his zanpakutou.

Byakuya felt the loss of Senbonzakura keenly, of course. It was a literal tearing away of a part of himself. But he had been assured that it was not necessary anymore for him to possess it, and indeed it was understandable that one forced into marriage must be inhibited from expressing related feelings with violence towards his royal mate. Still, it only added another layer to the noble's feeling of isolation. The king had indicated awareness of his loneliness. But even his constant attentions (mostly sexual) had not eased Byakuya's melancholy.

_Why won't these feelings go away?_

He pushed the thought aside and took advantage of his moment of apparent freedom by abandoning his bed and walking out onto the balcony. He was sure there must be guards about, but he couldn't see where they were. As always, there was much that was hidden from him.

_One would think that the king would know the contents of my heart, and would understand that I have no intention of abandoning my duty, or of acting out against him. The feeling of mistrust I get, despite my willingness to obey his every command becomes curious to me._

He tightened the tie at his waist and flash stepped over the railing, coming down lightly onto the grass and starting towards the trail that led into the gardens. Instantly, a guard appeared in front of him.

"Your highness," he said, not unkindly, "May I be of assistance to you, sir?"

_Ah, that is so much better than asking me what I'm doing, wandering about._

"No, Jun," he answered calmly, "I merely wished to stretch my legs, walking in the gardens."

"Of course, sir," replied the guard, "I will summon your attendant to join you."

"That is really not necessary," Byakuya said, shaking his head, "I..."

"My apologies, sir," the guard said tolerantly, "We have orders that you are not to be left unattended. It is meant for your safety."

"Hmmm," the noble sighed, "I understand. Arigatou, Jun."

He stood quietly with the guard at his side until his attendant appeared, looking oddly unsettled to Byakuya's mind, even frightened.

"Your highness!" the young man exclaimed, "You should have summoned me. The king would be angry if he knew that you were out unescorted. Please, just ask for me next time. You don't want to get me in trouble, ne?"

"No, surely not," Byakuya said, frowning, "My apologies, Masato."

"It is all right, sir," the youth said, brightening, "Come, you must be restless, being inside so much. Would you like to go to the healing pool for a warm soak?"

"That will be fine," Byakuya said, falling in with the attendant.

The guard watched them as they walked away, then disappeared into the trees.

"It is actually good to see you wanting some fresh air," commented Masato as they made their way down the trail, "You worried everyone, preferring to remain in your room so much at first, although we understood that you would need to adjust to living here."

"Well, you have helped to make the adjustment easier, Masato...although, no offense to you, of course, I do miss my own attendant. He had been with me since I was a teen, and he knew me well."

"I understand how you must feel, leaving him behind like that. You must be so frustrated, having to instruct me about your likings. I do hope that I manage to make you comfortable."

"You do," Byakuya assured the youth, "It is just that there is no one I know here. I was hoping that I might see my grandfather. He was called to serve the king here, but although I have asked several times, he has been on a long assignment."

"Well, perhaps he will be back soon. But while you wait, you can get to know some new people, ne?"

"Yes," the noble sighed, "I suppose so."

Their conversation faded as Byakuya slowly fell under the spell of the gentle, fragrant breeze and lovely expanses of varied types of flowers, blossoming trees, large, green meadows, and an array of wild creatures who wandered freely through the area.

_I would almost trade places with them, _he mused.

They reached the central gardens, where Masato led the noble to the warm healing waterfall and pool. As they approached the pool, Byakuya felt an inward quiver at seeing the king already undressed and reclining in the water.

"Ah, my lovely mate," he said approvingly, "I had heard that you emerged from our bedroom. Come. Join me."

It didn't escape him how quickly his attendant disappeared.

_It is more like he fled..._

_Why do they all seem so afraid of him? I know he is the most powerful of us, but he made our worlds and set us free to be a part of them...to choose our paths and live as we will._

_Except for those of us who are bound to serve him, of course._

Not wanting to alert the king to his thoughts, He quickly disrobed and walked down into the water, all too aware of how the king's eyes raked his naked body as he moved. He was less than surprised to be pulled into the man's possessive embrace as he sat down, and he yielded easily to the king's amorous kisses.

"I was worried for you, my love," the king said, kissing him on the forehead, then sinking hungrily into his mouth, "I was wondering how long it would be before you would abandon your loneliness and come to me."

The king's smile warmed as Byakuya's hands began to return his touches with gentle pressure and light caresses. Their kisses intensified and the king spread his legs and nudged the noble firmly in the direction of his privates. Byakuya's mouth laid a trail of kisses down his collarbone, then descended his breast to where he reached the water. Then, he continued kissing his way downward, still a bit unsettled, even though the healing water was breathable, even beneath the surface. Even more was the sight of his husband's engorged member.

_Is he always like this? It seems that I arouse him every time we are together. I do not even try to do so._

The king's hand wrapped around the back of the noble's graceful, white neck. He guided Byakuya downward, then watched closely as the noble hesitated, then began to pleasure him. Byakuya was somewhat relieved that the water dampened the sounds coming from the other man. He wasn't sure why, but the king's sounds of pleasure unnerved him.

_It shouldn't be that way, _he thought as he closed his eyes and sank down on his royal mate's arousal, _I should long to hear my lover's sounds of ecstasy. I loved hearing the sounds that Renji made._

He sucked in a surprised breath as the king's fingers curled into the swirls of his hair under the water, and pulled until his head tilted, and he met the man's strange eyes. A sliver of anxiety passed through him.

_Does he know I was thinking of Renji?_

_He must._

_On second thought, it must be obvious that I would._

Byakuya looked steadily into the king's eyes, reading the muted anger and aggressiveness that laid beneath their calm surface.

_He never gets angry on the surface. He is always in complete control of himself. But one must be when one is a god, and can kill with a thought._

His heart pounded uncomfortably, considering that, and he increased the intensity of the contact, making the man's eyes go nearly black with lust. The hand in Byakuya's hair tightened again, and forced him to move faster and take the king's length in deeper, until he nearly choked. Byakuya's hands clenched, where they held onto the king's inner thighs, and even beneath the healing water's surface, Byakuya heard and felt the rumble of the king's lusty growl. He held Byakuya's head motionless as he climaxed, using his free hand to stroke the noble's throat as he swallowed repeatedly. Byakuya was relieved at being allowed to close his eyes again, but suffered shivers of repulsion at being so intimate with someone he did not love. He opened them again as he was brought to the surface of the pool, and the king met him for a barrage of fierce, hard kisses.

The king gazed down at Byakuya's piqued member and smiled in a way that made the noble's breath catch. The man's hands explored him thoroughly, then, beginning with gentle caresses meant to relax him somewhat, then deepening into more provocative touches. Byakuya found himself blushing at his own reactions.

_I don't love this man, but he knows how to force my own body to betray me. I cannot help but be aroused by him. He won't accept anything else. I cannot help but respond to him. He is relentless._

And the time he took, slowly forcing Byakuya's body into a heightened state of arousal, gave him time for his own member to regain its hardness. As soon as it did, the king stood in the pool and gripped Byakuya's slim hips tightly in both hands, joining their bodies as Byakuya's hands pressed against the stone side of the healing pool to brace him. The monarch lost all gentleness then, thrusting hard and glaring down into the noble's hazed, gray eyes, demanding his attentiveness. All thoughts of Renji Abarai were forced out of Byakuya's mind as the king brought him quickly to the edges of bliss. He held the noble there, looking down into his eyes, the unspoken message between them clear.

_You live and breathe at my command. I give you everything. And I am the only one whom you will ever be with this way again. Do not dare to forget that._

The king released, jolting him with scathing heat and forcing him into his own gripping climax. He blushed harder at the sounds that escaped him, but knew better than to arouse the monarch's anger by letting his ears fall beneath the surface, where he wouldn't have to hear so clearly.

_I see, _Byakuya thought, gazing up at his husband, _The time for lenience is over. If I do not let go of the past now, he will punish me._

_Renji, I am sorry, but I have no choice._

_I have to let go of you for my own survival. Because, I think if I resist too much more, this man...this god...just might become angry enough to destroy me._

His heart calmed as the king parted from him, then sat down again and pulled Byakuya close. It took the noble a moment to discover that the king had frozen and was looking at him strangely. Then, he realized that it wasn't water from the pool that was running so freely down his face.

To his surprise, the monarch smiled approvingly and held him more tightly.

"I am sorry," Byakuya whispered, "I..."

"Don't apologize," his husband said, touching the streaming tears with a fingertip, "There is no hope left in your eyes. You have accepted that you are mine now. This is just an emptying of those lost hopes. It is a welcome thing, and nothing to apologize for."

"Yes, my lord," Byakuya said, letting his head fall onto the king's shoulder.

It did feel better, he thought, to let go. The way to Renji was closed, and it was only a weight on his heart to hope that would change. It was much easier to settle into those other strong arms, to look up into those entrancing eyes and feel himself begin to disappear. His whole existence now came down to this one person, and now he realized that the king was the only one left for him to cling to. He looked at his fingers, where they clenched the other man's shoulders and he hated himself for being weak, for having no powers, for letting himself be trapped and taken away from everything.

_But I am a noble, the greatest of the king's servants. And if I do not give him everything, then I am a disgrace._

The words themselves, seemed hollow.

_Noble._

_Disgrace._

_Which one am I really?_

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji woke to find himself buried in warm blankets and tucked into the most comfortable bed he'd ever slept in. But, opening his eyes, he found himself at a complete loss as to where, exactly, he was.

_The fourth is way more white, and the beds are stiff and uncomfortable. It's not my own bed, or one of Kisuke's. Where the hell am I?_

He heard a soft footstep and looked up at the doorway. At first, he thought the silhouette he saw was Byakuya's, but a moment later, the man stepped into the light, and Renji recognized him.

"Tetsuya?"

The noble nodded and moved to his bedside, where he sat down in a chair. He leaned over Renji, checking the bandages on his body, then sat back, looking at the redhead, as though at a loss for words.

"What is it? What happened?" Renji asked.

"I was wondering the same thing," Tetsuya answered, sounding vaguely unnerved, "Have you come to your senses?"

"What?" Renji asked, frowning.

"We found you in a cabin on the estate. There was a fire there, and Arashi rescued you," the noble explained.

"Oh," said the redhead, blinking and sitting up slowly, "Oh, that's right. I remember now. Be sure and thank the ol' fleabag for me."

"I already have," Tetsuya said, yielding a small smile, "But, Renji-san, I am bothered by something."

"What is it?"

"I am wondering why you were there."

"Huh?" queried Renji, "Why I was...? Oh, why I was at the cabin?"

"Why you came to the estate," Tetsuya corrected him, "Why did you come here?"

"Why did I come here?" Renji repeated, frowning, "I came to see Byakuya...to visit his grave."

Tetsuya gave him a blank look.

"Byakuya?" he repeated questioningly, "Who are you talking about?"


	4. Two Truths

**Chapter 4: Two Truths**

_"I came to see Byakuya...to visit his grave," said Renji._

_Tetsuya gave him a blank look._

_"Byakuya?" he repeated questioningly, "Who are you talking about?"_

Renji frowned in confusion.

"_Byakuya_...your cousin? Former clan leader? Rukia's brother?" he clarified, "Tetsuya..."

"I don't understand," said Tetsuya, shaking his head and narrowing his eyes, "Ginrei Kuchiki was our last leader."

"Okay," Renji said, a desperate look on his face, "C'mon Tetsuya, quit messing with me, here! Byakuya! Captain of the sixth division. He was the guy who rescued you from the half-breed's prison. For kami's sake, you grew up with the guy!"

"I am sorry," Tetsuya answered, looking increasingly spooked, "but you are not remembering correctly, Captain."

"Look, stop calling me that, Tetsuya," Renji complained, sitting up, "You and I are friends. We became that way because we both are protective of Byakuya. He means a lot to _both of us_! I don't know what's happened to you, but something really crazy is going on."

Tetsuya went quiet, not knowing what to say to calm the redhead. Renji thought carefully.

"Tetsuya, you have Arashi, right?"

"Arashi?" Tetsuya repeated, "Yes, of course. He is part of my own soul. Why?"

"Then, let's talk to him. He saw me here, just like you did. Tetsuya, you were waiting for me to have tea in the gardens with you. Something's really messed up here!"

"I agree," said the noble, "I don't know you to be an eccentric person. You are usually very grounded."

"Th-thanks," the redhead said uncertainly, taking another look at the room they were in, "Um, Tetsuya, it looks like we're in the manor, but...I don't remember this room. Where are we?"

"I...when we found you, Arashi sensed an odd reiatsu in the area...something or someone of extreme power, perhaps on a transcendent level. Because of that, and the fact that the blaze appeared to have been purposely set, I brought you to the only place that you would be safe from that kind of enemy...the Kuchiki family archive."

"The archive," Renji said, looking around.

"This is a recess I normally use when conducting involved research, so I do not have to leave for long periods of time. I brought a clan healer in to heal you, then masked your reiatsu and sealed the archive, so that only you and I can enter it."

"So...whoever set the fire, was seriously dangerous," Renji mused, "I wonder if that person is the one who screwed with your memory."

Renji closed his eyes and thought carefully for a moment.

"Tetsuya, Byakuya once told me that the clan leaders here keep diaries...books that sort of 'write themselves' as the clan leader experiences things. It's done from the leader's perspective, right."

Tetsuya's eyes widened.

"Yes," he confirmed, "that is how the diaries work."

"So, if they are stored here, we can just look at them and see what they say, ne?" Renji suggested.

"Yes," Tetsuya agreed.

He touched a hand to Renji's chest as the redhead started to rise.

"Wait," he said, shaking his head, "You were injured and need to stay here. I will bring my diary here."

"And see if Byakuya's is there," Renji said, sitting back.

Renji waited quietly, his mind overwhelmed with trying to figure out what was happening as Tetsuya left the room for several long minutes. Just as the redhead began to lose his patience, the door to the recess opened and the clan leader returned, wearing an unhappy expression.

"What is it?" Renji asked.

Tetsuya sighed.

"You can look for yourself," he said, handing Renji his diary, "I scanned it several times, because I know that you are usually reliable, and that you sincerely believe what you are saying. But your reality seems to have shifted somehow. It does not match with what really happened."

Renji gave him a stunned look, then frowned and opened the diary. He turned back several weeks and scanned a page, then caught his breath and looked up at the noble.

"Tetsuya, what are you talking about? It's right here!"

"What?" the clan leader queried, wearing a mystified expression, "What are you talking about? I just read it and..."

"Tetsuya, look! Right here!" Renji exclaimed, holding up the volume, "In your own words!"

He turned to a page and held the diary so that Tetsuya could see.

"Byakuya died over a month ago, in the war!" he insisted, "You wrote about it here. See? It is one of the most difficult days imaginable, and the end of an era. Word came from the battlefield that my cousin, Byakuya, died at the hands of the enemy quincy, As Nodt. There, see?"

Tetsuya's face paled.

"I see," he said, staring, "But Renji, the name of the one killed is clearly 'Ginrei.' Do you not see that?"

"No," Renji said, suddenly making a connection, "Tetsuya, we are looking at the same thing and seeing something different. You _know_ what that means."

Tetsuya gazed at him quietly, comprehension falling over him and leaving him chilled.

"An illusion?" he whispered, "But...no shinigami, not even Aizen could do something on this level. This enemy we have, the one who did this, is a transcendent."

He stared at the diary, thinking.

"And we have to find out, because both of us feel equally strongly that our 'truth' is the real one. We have to find some way of divining whose past has been altered! Did Byakuya never exist and someone wanted to discredit you by making you believe that he had...or..."

"Did someone try to _erase_ him?" Renji breathed.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Thank you, Masato," Byakuya said quietly as his attendant accompanied him out of the palace and into the gardens, "I know that you are busy, but I needed some privacy to think for a bit."

Masato smiled.

"But it is not too unpleasant, ne? The way his majesty dotes on you? He obviously loves you very much."

"Y-yes," the noble agreed, "But a lot has happened, and I just need time to process it all. You understand, ne?"

"Oh, yes, of course, your highness," the young man said, nodding, "You have been through a lot, nearly dying at the hands of that quincy, then waking up here at the palace. It has to have been a great shock. Take your time, then. I am in no hurry. Take all of the time you need, sir."

"Masato, you do not need to be so formal when we are alone."

"Ah, but his majesty is very stringent in his rules about that. I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, but I must speak correctly when addressing a royal family member."

"Oh, very well," Byakuya sighed, shaking his head and starting down the pathway.

The two walked in silence for several minutes, leaving the green, grassy area and walking into the forest.

"It is so odd how all of this is contained within the king's 'cocoon' structure," Byakuya mused, "It is larger on the inside than the outside makes it look. Strange..."

"I think so too."

Byakuya breathed in the pleasant scents of pine and damp soil, letting his mind wander back over recent events, and trying to make peace with them. Masato walked quietly at his side, stealing measured glances at him, from time to time and wearing an affectionate, but somewhat worried expression.

"Your majesty, we are wandering quite far. Are you sure that we shouldn't turn back now?"

"I am sorry," Byakuya said tolerantly, "I was accustomed to long walks at home. If it is a problem for you, I could meet you back at the palace."

"Oh no!" Masato exclaimed, "His majesty would have me _executed_ if I came back without you! He is very protective of you, your highness."

"I am capable of looking out for myself," Byakuya said, giving the young man an annoyed look, "I don't know why he is so..."

He stopped himself forcibly.

"Forgive me," he said, more softly, "I am grateful for the king's intervention that saved my life. And he has been very patient with me while I've adjusted."

"But giving up your life and all of the people who you knew must be very distressing for you," said Masato, "I understand, sir."

"Again, I thank you, Masato. And I will be fine. It was an adjustment, but I do feel like I have made progress. And I am grateful for your part in helping me do that."

"Ah, you are most welcome, your highness. I am glad I was of help to you."

"I just wish that there was some way to occasionally look down and see how my loved ones are doing."

Masato looked away uncomfortably.

"I would bring back the viewer if I could," he said, shaking his head, "but his majesty said that it would only cause you pain to continue looking back."

"Hmmm, perhaps he is right in that," Byakuya said carefully, "Forget that I asked you about that."

"Oh, no problem, sir."

Byakuya turned them back towards the palace, taking a different trail to keep the scenery fresh. They had walked about halfway back, when he paused and swayed dizzily for a moment.

"Your highness?" Masato said, touching his arm to steady him, "Are you...? Your highness!"

Byakuya felt himself collapsing, but could do nothing to stop it. Masato's worried voice disappeared for a time, and his mind spun haphazardly around the facts of his situation. But he could make no more sense of the details in this state than he could awake. He wondered briefly what had happened to him, and if he might be dying. But what he felt was not at all like what he had experienced after his battle with the quincy.

The darkness seemed to go on forever, but some time later, his mind cleared and he began to hear fuzzy voices around him. The king, his advisor, the guards, Masato, then a feminine voice that seemed heartbreakingly familiar.

"Brother?"

Byakuya inhaled sharply and opened his eyes, then stared up into that, much longed for face that he hardly dared to believe that he was seeing.

"Rukia?" he whispered back.

The violet-eyed girl let out a soft sob and curled a hand into his.

"Rukia, how did you get here?"

"I brought her here," said the king, stepping into view from behind her, "You were having such a difficult time, and I thought that having someone familiar near to you might ease your unhappiness."

"But...Rukia is an officer of the thirteenth division," the noble objected, "She worked hard to reach that position...!"

"And she willingly gave that up to come here," said the king, "I did not force her."

"He didn't," Rukia insisted, "Brother, when the king's messenger came, all I wanted to do was to get to you! I thought that you were dead! We all did."

"But Rukia, you had a life there, in the Seireitei," Byakuya said, shaking his head, "You cannot just leave it behind. What of your friends? What of Renji? He's like a brother to you!"

"Oh," said Rukia, "you don't know? Brother..."

"What is it?" Byakuya asked breathlessly, "Rukia, what is happening?"

"Brother, I am so sorry. I thought they must have told you. Renji was killed in a fire yesterday."

"What?" Byakuya whispered, reeling from the impact of the words.

"Perhaps, we should let your brother rest now," suggested the king in a concerned voice, "He looks overwrought at the news. This wasn't the best time to tell him, I think."

"But Renji is...?"

"I am sorry, my love," the king said, sitting down at his side and taking his hand, "I wish that things could be different, but I am afraid it is true. Renji Abarai was killed."

"But, I just saw him...at the cabin," Byakuya managed, his face going ghostly pale.

"The cabin at the manor?" Rukia said, staring at him, "Brother, that is where Renji died. There was a fire at the cabin on the Kuchiki estate!"

"At the cabin," Byakuya repeated numbly, "But he was only there because I...this is my fault..."

"No," said the king, squeezing his hand gently, "You did nothing wrong, Byakuya."

"But _I _was the reason that he went there! And I made him sleep. That must be why he couldn't escape! I...!"

He started to go on, but felt a gentle throb of kido pass through the king's hand and into him. The air grew dark around him and he faded out again. But even in the darkness of unconsciousness, he couldn't escape the facts.

_Renji is dead._

_And he is dead because of me!_

XXXXXXXXXX

"Before we leave the archive," said Tetsuya, "Use this mod soul. It will conceal your reiatsu and change your appearance. Remember, everyone thinks you are dead, so we want to take advantage of that, if we can."

Renji managed a small smile.

"It sounds like you think that I'm the one who's right," he chuckled softly.

"Not necessarily," Tetsuya said, watching as Renji swallowed the soul candy and his appearance changed, "I am just 'hedging my bets,' as it were. Whatever the truth is, someone is going to a lot of trouble to rearrange things. And it's a powerful person. A misstep could end with us all being killed. But, first things first, where do we start?"

Renji thought carefully.

"Rukia," he decided.

"Rukia?"

"Byakuya's sister," said Renji, "She lived here at the manor. Let's go and check out her room."

"Eh...where?" Tetsuya asked.

"Just follow me," Renji said, leading Tetsuya out of the archive.

The two flash stepped across the manor grounds until they came to one of the rooms, where Renji stopped and gestured to the door.

"That's it," he said, "That's Rukia's bedroom."

The two walked into the room and looked around.

"I see a room full of her things!" Renji announced.

Tetsuya swallowed hard.

"And I see an empty extra bedroom," he said, shaking his head, "Renji..."

"Yeah...weird."

"And frightening," Tetsuya whispered, "Do you have any idea what it would take to do something like this?"

Renji sighed softly, considering the facts again.

"But we still don't know for sure who's right here."

"So, we should move on," Tetsuya concluded, "But where to next?"

The two considered for a moment, then exchanged glances.

"You said that you came to see his grave," Tetsuya said.

They flash stepped out of the bedroom and through the gardens, passing through the back gate and racing down the forest path to the cemetery gates. They slid to a halt as a large, dark form loomed up in front of them and an equine whinny sounded.

"Hey Fleabag," Renji chuckled, "Good to see you're still here. What, with everyone and everything changing around me. Sorry, no hair tie to steal. You already stole it, remember?"

Arashi looked back at him blankly.

"What?" said Renji, "You don't remember either?"

The redhead looked back at the sakura tree and caught sight of the hair tie still hanging in the branches, near the top. He frowned and flash stepped into the air, snagging it and then settling back onto the ground in front of the noble and his horse. The two stared at him, squinting oddly.

"Renji, what are you doing?" asked Tetsuya.

"The hair tie," Renji said, looking down at it and turning it over in his hands, "You...don't see it?"

Arashi stepped forward and sniffed quietly at Renji's hand, froze for a moment, then stepped back, snorting and showing the whites of his sapphire eyes.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Renji exclaimed, staring.

"Arashi sees it too," Tetsuya said in a stunned voice, "He remembers you being here."

Tetsuya laid a hand on the stallion's face and closed his eyes, and a soft blue glow rose up around the two for a moment.

"What is that? What are you doing?" asked Renji.

Tetsuya looked back at the redhead, his eyes displaying deep distress.

"Arashi is...he is...an extension of my own soul. But, we exist separately, except when we enter my divine form."

"Divine form?" Renji queried, his eyes going wide, "You...?"

"It is not known to others, though Ginrei knew, I have begun to train to be inducted into the ranks of the king's mounted guard, the Norite. It is a special appointment, but requires ten years of training outside the spirit dimension, learning to take on the divine form of the shinigami tenba, the Pegasus. I am a shinigami, but Arashi is my fighting spirit, which has begun to transcend. When I connect with him, I see things through his eyes and he sees through mine. And when we connected right now, he shared with me, and I was able to see the hair tie."

"You see it now?" Renji asked, relief rising in his eyes.

"Yes," Tetsuya confirmed, "I see it. But Renji, you realize that we are going to have a difficult time convincing anyone else of this."

"Not to mention, we don't have any idea at all, who we can trust," the redhead added.

"There may be someone," Tetsuya posited, "but we will have to attempt that after some planning. In the meantime, you should return to the archive."

"First things first," Renji said, shaking his head, "I need to make sure Rukia is okay."

"But...how do we do that?" asked Tetsuya, "How do we find her when, to my knowledge, she never came here?"

"There is a computer in the archive, ne?" asked Renji.

"Yes."

"Does it connect with the central database?"

"Of course," answered the noble, "We have several family members on the Central 46 council, and high clearances."

"Good, then we can look her up and see where it says that she is."

Renji paused for a moment, frowning.

"Tetsuya, I thought you said that you saw things my way now."

"I am no longer in physical contact with Arashi," the noble explained, "so, I see things from my shinigami state."

He looked up at the stallion and nodded.

"Come, Arashi. We are going to need your help."


	5. Light of the Dark Truth

**Chapter 5: Light of the Dark Truth**

**(Inspired by the Grace Potter song called 'Stars.')**

Byakuya cringed inwardly at waking to find himself unclothed and held close to the soul king's warm, naked form, the monarch's arm wound firmly around his waist. The king, of course, had every right to the noble's body, but something inside Byakuya simply refused to accept that he belonged to the king in that fashion.

_I don't know why, when my mind accepts this, my heart stubbornly refuses to obey. I am the king's husband. I shouldn't resist whatever he desires of me. And I shouldn't long for the touch of anyone else, especially now that Renji is..._

Tears returned to his eyes and leaked onto his face, then onto his pillow.

_Maybe if I had truly accepted my fate...maybe then Renji would still be alive._

_Is this my punishment, then?_

_Because I could not put my desire for the man aside and embrace my fate, Renji died?_

He shifted slightly so that he could see the sleeping king's face.

_I have sensed my lord's anger, though he never expresses it overtly. So, could he have been angered and saw that Renji would die if I went to him? Did he, perhaps alter Renji's fate, himself?_

_What is the truth?_

_And why will these feelings not leave me?_

He realized all at once that the king's eyes had opened, and the monarch was looking quietly back at him. He was completely unsurprised when just that little moment of eye contact between them made the monarch's reiatsu flare softly and his expression darken with lust.

_He said that while my body is primed for breeding, as it has been, he will be more desirous. This should not be surprising._

_But why is he so aroused and I feel nothing of that? _

_Is it my mental state? My lack of love for him? My pain over Renji? My fears that Renji only died because of me?_

To Byakuya's surprise, the monarch held back from initiating sex and gazed warmly into his eyes.

"Good morning, Byakuya," he said quietly, his fingers brushing the noble's face, then touching his hair lightly, "I hope you feel better now that you have rested."

Byakuya yielded a small smile and nodded.

"The rest did help, thank you," he replied softly.

"I know that the news your sister brought was shocking for you. Such losses are very painful."

He blinked slowly, still looking into Byakuya's eyes meaningfully and leaving the noble with the intense, worried feeling that something else had happened.

"Rukia?" he asked quickly.

"Rukia is fine," the king assured him.

"But your eyes tell me that something else has happened," the noble went on.

The king smiled and nodded.

"Well, yes, actually. But this thing is a good thing...something likely to help to ease your melancholy."

"Oh?"

He felt an odd twinge inside at the way the king continued to look at him, measuring his words.

"Yes, my love. You remember that just before your sister's arrival, you collapsed in the gardens?"

"Oh, yes," Byakuya said, remembering, "It was likely just stress from recent events. I will be fine."

The king's smile gentled, strangely just increasing the feeling of discomfort inside him.

"You will be fine," the monarch agreed, "but it was not mere stress that caused your collapse."

"It wasn't?" the noble queried, realization beginning to fall over him.

_I am...?_

"You are with child, Byakuya," the king said, looking pleased, "We have been successful in seeding the heir."

Even having suspected, the words struck Byakuya with unnatural force. He felt tears forming again, and lowered his gaze, only to have the king capture his chin and raise it again. The look on his face was as gentle as ever, but Byakuya felt the swell of darker emotion hidden beneath the surface. A fingertip caught one of the noble's tears.

"You are overwhelmed?" he asked, again with that very slight, meaningful inflection.

"Yes, my lord," Byakuya agreed, reaching up to dry his eyes, "I apologize for my overreaction."

The king surprised him with a gentle, but firm kiss that felt to Byakuya like a muted warning.

"That is all right," the king assured him, "The impact of recent events and the chemical changes that occurred in your body because of our lovemaking have affected you."

"Of course," the noble agreed, closing his eyes for a moment, then opening them again, "but I am happy, my lord."

Byakuya froze momentarily and sat up as a sudden thought struck him. The king sat up next to him, his eyes curious.

"What is it?" the king asked, studying his face carefully.

Byakuya felt another flicker of disturbance in the monarch's reiatsu.

"Do not worry," he assured the noble, "You remember, I told you...only the king's body can cause yours to conceive. Your Renji was a commoner. He could not impregnate you. Your sin had no effect on that process. You needn't worry. The child is ours."

"Yes, my lord," Byakuya answered, bowing his head respectfully.

_If only..._

_If only I had that much of you left to hold on to._

_When I missed your warmth, I could put my arms around our child. When I longed to feel some part of you near me, I would only have to look as far as our baby's face. Oh Renji, as wrong as it is, I wish this baby was yours!_

"You have done well," the king said warmly, "I am grateful for your commitment to our union."

The king's hand curved around Byakuya's face, drawing him in for a kiss.

"Can we take a walk together, my lord?" Byakuya asked suddenly, "I would enjoy some fresh morning air, and the walking would be good for the baby and me."

"Ah, my apologies, but there are some matters needing my attention today. I shall have your sister summoned and she can join you. I will return to you tonight."

"Very well."

The king smiled and kissed him, then departed their bed and summoned his attendant. Byakuya watched as the attendant entered the room and quickly dressed the monarch. He kept his face carefully turned, so that it looked as though he was sleeping, and in doing so, noticed several times when the attendant's eyes touched him.

_There is something..._he thought, stealing a better look.

He blinked to clear his eyes, then closed them as the attendant's gaze touched him again. When the king was fully dressed and the two were leaving, Byakuya sat up and looked more closely. Something still seemed wrong about what he was seeing, but he wasn't sure what it was.

Some time later, he realized.

_I don't remember that man having silver hair._

XXXXXXXXXX

"This just gets stranger and stranger!" Renji exclaimed as Tetsuya checked and rechecked the Central 46 records.

"So very odd," the noble agreed, "You say that you see the records, but you saw no sign of her either when we looked?"

"That's right," said Renji with certainty, "but how can that be? I _know_ she exists. The records I see support that. And I even see signs that she was in the Seireitei recently. She should have been here, at Kuchiki Manor, at the thirteenth or on assignment. She isn't anywhere that she would be normally! I just don't get it."

"Neither do I," agreed Tetsuya, "but one thing occurs to me. And that is that Rukia's disappearance comes at a suspicious time, in being so close to the disappearance of Byakuya."

His brow furrowed as he tried to make sense of their findings.

"Renji, you need to think carefully," he went on, "You say that Byakuya led the sixth division and that he was leader of our clan before his disappearance."

"Before his death," Renji corrected the noble, "He died in the first of the quincy invasions."

"And you say that you came to the manor..."

"I came to visit his grave."

"Where I see nothing and you see the marker."

"Yeah."

What happened then?"

Renji took a breath, thinking deeply.

"I uh...was just saying a few words. I was saying that if only I had one more day, I would have..."

Tetsuya's eyebrow arched questioningly.

"You would have...?"

Renji held back a moment longer, then let out a shuddering sigh.

"I was in love with him," he admitted, fighting the sting of rising tears, "I was in love with him, but I couldn't say anything to him."

"Because you are a commoner?" Tetsuya asked quietly.

"Yeah," the redhead said more softly, "He had already broken the rules to marry Rukia's sister, Hisana. He broke them again to adopt Rukia as his sister. It meant a lot to him to stick to the rules after that. And I didn't have the heart to mess with that. I respected him. I wasn't going to put him through that."

Tetsuya smiled gently.

"You sound like a good friend. You say that we are friends, and even though I do not remember without Arashi's help, I see what kind of person you are. That is what makes me believe so strongly that you are telling me the truth."

"Heh, that's a relief," said Renji, "I was scared when you didn't know Byakuya. I thought you might have me committed or something. Thank you, Tetsuya, for believing me."

"You are welcome," said the noble, "But now, we have to try to figure out who is behind all of this."

"Well, we checked out Aizen," said Renji, "and we both saw the prisoner manifests that said he's still in there...in Muken."

"Right," said Tetsuya, "That removes one person from our suspicion. But, do you know of any others, perhaps family members, colleagues or former associates who might have a reason to do something like this?"

Renji shook his head in frustration.

"I'd have put my money on Aizen," he sighed, "but the guy's here."

"I think I would like to check that out personally," said Tetsuya, "I have entered a request for visitation so that we can question him."

"You can _do_ that?" asked Renji, looking impressed.

"Yes," Tetsuya said, nodding, "We have a number of family members on council and high clearances for such things. So, we should be granted a visit. It just may take several days."

"And in the meantime, we can get busy trying to see if anyone else seems aware of this weird crap that's going on," finished Renji.

"Right," said Tetsuya, nodding, "But for now, I want you to be very careful. That gigai isn't necessarily foolproof. So, you should remain in the archive as much as possible when we are not directly investigating this. This person is incredibly dangerous of he or she can make people 'disappear' and try to kill you."

Tetsuya frowned and met Renji's eyes curiously.

"Renji," he said, "They have taken two Kuchiki family members, but they tried to kill you...and they failed. That seems odd to me. Can you tell me any more about the attempt on your life at the cabin?"

Renji nodded.

"I had just said that I would do anything to have another day with Byakuya," he explained, "Then, all of a sudden, someone touched me on the shoulder and I turned around."

Renji's eyes saddened as he remembered.

"It was Byakuya."

"You saw him?"

"Yeah. Yeah, he was here. I saw him."

"Did he say anything to you?" the noble asked.

"Uh-huh. He ah, said that he heard me. But he said he couldn't explain, and that we only had twenty-four hours."

Tetsuya nodded.

"Think carefully," he prompted the redhead, do any of his words stand out?"

"Hmmm..." said Renji, thinking carefully, "He said that we only had a short time to make peace with the way things are. He...told me that I was the only one who could see him."

"So," concluded Tetsuya, "It sounds as though he knew about the illusion."

"Yeah," Renji said, realization lighting his face, "I think he must have. And he said that we had to make peace with that...with him being away from us. I thought at the time that I must be dreaming or hallucinating, but no, Byakuya knew what was happening."

"This means that he is alive, but he cannot come back to us."

"And it looks like Rukia might be with him," Renji posited.

"So, it seems that they are alive and either being held by someone against their will...or cooperating, for whatever reason."

"Yeah," agreed the redhead, "But what bugs me is that if he was being held against his will, for some reason, why would the one holding him let him come back to see me specifically? To see me...to admit his love to me, and to make love with me like that. I don't understand that. If the person wanted to make it seem like he died, then why risk discovery by sending him back here?"

Renji strained his mind, going back over every detail of their interactions. He caught his breath softly as he recalled more of the noble's words.

"Wait a sec," he said, shaking his head, "I, uh, I remember that I told him that I would go with him. And he told me it wasn't possible. Tetsuya, he said that it wasn't _allowed!"_

"Ah," the noble said, comprehension in his sapphire eyes, "So, for whatever reason, he had agreed to this situation...to meeting you at the manor and exchanging affections, but then, returning to whomever placed these conditions on him."

"But it just doesn't make sense to me why he was allowed to come back," Renji said, a frustrated edge to his voice, "I mean, if they didn't want to be discovered..."

"But Renji," said Tetsuya, "You must remember, after this meeting with Byakuya, he was 'erased,' not before!"

"So?"

"And just after is when you noticed that the rest of us had 'forgotten' him and Rukia too disappeared. Whoever did this wasn't worried about discovery because he figured that everyone else would forget..."

He paused, inhaling sharply.

"And this person or people thought _that you would be dead_!"

"That's right!" Renji exclaimed, his eyes widening, "But Tetsuya, that still doesn't tell me why whoever it was let Byakuya come back to see me."

"Well," Tetsuya answered, his blue eyes intense, "Either it was an act of good will to affect Byakuya's thinking or behavior, or...there was something in that meeting between you that this person or people stood to gain from."

"But how would anyone gain from Byakuya and me confessing our love and making love?" Renji asked desperately, "It doesn't make sense!"

"No," Tetsuya agreed, "So we need to pursue this until it _does_!"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Thank you, Masato," Byakuya said quietly as the attendant finished tying his sleeping yukata in place, "You may go now."

"Good night, your highness," the attendant said, bowing, then turning and leaving him alone in the royal suite.

Byakuya stood for a moment, studying his reflection in the dressing mirror and letting his hand drift down to his abdomen.

_I am having the soul king's child._

He closed his eyes and focused on the small presence inside him.

_I have to stop doing this...have to stop wishing this was Renji's baby. That wish is just not possible. As much as I love Renji, the fact of royal pregnancy is absolute. Only the king can impregnate me. _

_Only the soul king, to whom I have been given by the king's prism as consort._

An image flashed in his mind of the triangular, many faceted prism that the king always kept in his possession...that laid at their bedside while they mated.

_Why did the kings of the past choose me to be this monarch's spouse?_

He wondered, if he touched the artifact, if it would speak to him.

_But his majesty never lets me touch it. He never lets anyone else lay hands on it. I would think it suspicious, but it is hard to know what is 'normal' here. The spirit dimension and royal palace are such different places. I do not understand all of the rules and customs. Perhaps there is good reason, but..._

He stepped away from the mirror and started towards the balcony door. He stopped just short, desiring the comfort of the gentle evening breeze, but unable to face the overwhelming beauty of the night sky.

_How many times did I stand under those lovely stars and moon and dream of a future with Renji? It seems like just yesterday that I stood in my own home and thought such things. But those things are gone now. And I fear that to look up into that sky will only make my heart break again._

_I have no more dreams._

_No more hopes._

_Nothing but this future of service to the king._

_Am I wicked to ache for what I've sacrificed?_

_Is it wrong to cry for what I've lost?_

_If Renji was never meant to be in my life, then why do I long for him, even now that I know he is gone? It is a pain deep down in my body...something instinctive. And why do I not feel this preordained connection that the prism has said exists? I look at is majesty and I think of him as kind, gentle but firm, and sometimes hiding a deep anger. But I feel no bond with him...not even through this child that grows in me. The baby's presence only seems to make me long for Renji even more._

_Why do I have such feelings?_

_I have never failed to see reality before. And I accept my place at the king's side. This resistance comes from within, and refuses to be deterred by common sense. _

_I don't understand._

He started to turn away from the doors, when a soft, feminine sob sounded from somewhere outside the door. Frowning, he abandoned his reticence and passed through the doors. He stepped out onto the balcony, flinching as the moon shined down brightly on his face. He turned his head to look in the direction of Rukia's room, and caught sight of her sitting in a chair on her balcony, with her face in her hands, and crying uncontrollably. He was up over the balcony rail and at her side in a moment. He sat down next to her and slipped an arm around her, resting his chin on the top of her head as she grabbed the front of his yukata and sobbed into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" she cried miserably, "I know I shouldn't be this way, but...R-renji...Renji was like my own brother! He was so strong, Byakuya! He wasn't supposed to die in some stupid fire. He was a captain! He should have blown that place apart! Brother, how could Renji die like that? How could he leave me alone?"

He tried desperately to think of something to say, but somehow there seemed to be no words that would be able to make things right again. Instead, he tightened his arms around her and held her quietly as she loosed her grief in sobs that felt like they emanated from his own broken heart.

"I shouldn't be so selfish," Rukia chided herself, "I know that you cared about Renji too. You seemed to really respect each other by the end."

"I loved Renji," Byakuya whispered, then his eyes widened at his own words.

Rukia's head lifted off his shoulder and her teary eyes met his questioningly.

"Brother, you...?"

She broke off, staring as the soul king appeared on the balcony outside the royal suite, and his searching eyes found the two and gazed at them appraisingly. Byakuya swallowed hard and forced himself to let go of his sister. He touched her cheek gently and looked into her eyes and Rukia felt a measure of his strength pass into her.

_You're hurting too, Brother, _she thought, _but you hold everything inside. I should be there for you. You need someone._

Fresh tears leaked down her cheeks.

_You need someone now that you don't have him anymore!_

"I am sorry," she whispered again, rising and turning back into her room.

Byakuya watched her retreat through the doors, then flash stepped back to where the king waited for him on the balcony.

"Is Rukia all right?" the monarch inquired, slipping his arms around his noble mate, "She seemed beside herself."

"Well, as you know, she and Renji grew up together. It is natural that she would be overwrought by her emotions so soon after losing him."

"Yes," agreed the king, "and you are kind to comfort her. But...I wonder if it was right, bringing her here. I was giving more thought to what you said about her having a place of honor in the Gotei 13. Perhaps I should allow her to return to the Seireitei?"

"My lord, I wish I could say that I know what is best for my sister. But...I am at a loss."

"But, do you think that she will adjust here, or do you think it would be better to send her back to the home she knows?"

Byakuya considered his words, then shook his head gently.

"But it is not the home she remembers," he said finally, "Renji and I were a part of that home, and although she still has Tetsuya, she has suffered too much. I will try to help her adjust here."

"If you think that is best," said the king, sliding a hand into his, "Now, Byakuya, we must retire to our room. As part of your pregnancy, you must receive short infusions of the royal prism's reiatsu. It assists in the stabilization of your body, and in the framing of the heir's forming reiatsu."

"Very well," Byakuya said, turning back into the bedroom.

He walked to the bed and sat down, then waited quietly as the king slipped out of his robes, donned a yukata, and joined him. Strangely, it still felt odd to have the monarch hold him close. And it felt even stranger as the reiatsu from the prism flared golden, and passed through the king's body, out his extended hand and into Byakuya's slim abdomen.

He flinched at the throb of intial power, closing his eyes and trying to calm his racing heart.

_Something feels wrong._

The reiatsu that flowed into him made his insides ache and throb. Nausea swept over him, and the room began to spin around him. The king watched him closely, through unreadable eyes, reaching out as he began to be overcome, and inducing sleep. He frowned at the prism and adjusted the reiatsu he sent through it, altering it, using his illusions, until Byakuya sighed in his sleep and his body relaxed in the king's arms.

"Well, that isn't working too well," Gin observed, stepping into the room, "I thought you said that with the hougyoku's help, you could emulate the true king's reiatsu."

"Obviously, the technique is more intricate than I originally thought," Aizen admitted, "but I am not ready to give up just yet."

"Although it is strange that if the bonding _isn't_ working, then why hasn't Byakuya already died? His life is supposed to be bound to that of the soul king. And if you are not keeping him alive, then...who is?"

Aizen's eyes narrowed.

"We shall have to see, ne? Come, dress me and we will go to the library to research this phenomena."

Byakuya stirred softly as the two crossed the room and stepped into the dressing area. He turned his head and cracked an eye open, then spotted the king's prism still sitting next to the bed.

_I wonder..._

Listening carefully to the voices of the king and his attendant, he reached out a trembling hand in the direction of the artifact. His heart in his throat, he extended his fingertips, pausing just short, then steeling himself and closing the distance.

Byakuya's eyes widened in distress as soft, ghostly whispers rose up in his mind, their words chilling him to the core.

_Traitor!_

_He has killed the king!_

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the king emerge from within the dressing area, with his attendant at his side. He swiftly withdrew his hand and went perfectly still as the king approached.

"Byakuya?" he said, his voice sounding wrong to the noble.

He opened his eyes and sat up, then felt his heart freeze in his chest as he found himself looking at Sousuke Aizen.


	6. Flower Among Thorns

**Chapter 6: Flower Among the Thorns**

"Is something wrong, Byakuya?" Aizen asked casually, "Your condition is not making you feel overly ill, ne? You seemed quite uncomfortable during the stabilization. If you are still feeling poorly, I can call for my healer."

Byakuya's mind raced as it registered first that Aizen was impersonating the king, and secondly, that he obviously thought that Byakuya was unable to detect that fact. He thought carefully for a moment.

"I am fine, my lord," he answered, watching Aizen carefully, "I was just...still waking. My apologies for worrying you."

Aizen gave him a chilling smile.

"That is all right, my love. You have had a difficult time, but you are really beginning to accept your place here with a calmer heart. I am glad. I was concerned that your anxiety would interfere with the seeding of the heir. You know, you must be of the proper state of mind and be completely dedicated to the process if you are to carry the heir successfully."

Byakuya bit his lip gently and closed his eyes.

"Of course, my lord. I am devoted to giving birth to a strong child."

"I am certain you are," Aizen agreed, smirking, "But, even though we have seen to that and you are pregnant, I find I am all the more attracted to you. Come, let us be together."

Byakuya shivered as the other man pulled him closer and sought his mouth hungrily. He managed the first and second, by the third kiss, he was shaking softly.

_I don't know what to do! I am alone in this. No one here seems able to penetrate this illusion, and I am sure that they would only think I was crazy to suggest that he could have overcome the king without even the royal guard knowing about it. Kami, why would they not sense it? Did he kill them and leave illusions in their place too? How is he doing this? And what am I to do? As soon as he suspects that I know, he will..._

The noble stiffened, making Aizen pause and gaze at him questioningly. Byakuya made a pained expression and groaned softly.

"I am...sorry, my lord," he said solemnly, "It seems that I am having a difficult time."

"Ah," Aizen sighed, "The child's reiatsu has already destabilized. I shall have to use the prism to bring it back into balance, and then you must rest."

"Hai, my lord."

Byakuya watched with widened eyes as Aizen removed the king's prism from within his clothes and slowly drew power from it to feed into Byakuya's slim abdomen.

_Only the king should have been able to impregnate me,_ the noble mused as he continued to observe Aizen closely, _How would he be able to do that? Or did he slay the king after I was called here and impregnated? It makes sense now that I have been suffering setbacks. But the setbacks began before I was pregnant...and that makes me wonder. Who fathered this child? I know that I am the rightful consort. The spirits within the prism acknowledged me when I touched the device. But they did not accept Aizen as the rightful king. That means that they would not accept a child fathered by him. I am relieved. But that means that he must have killed the king after my impregnation._

A memory of his lovemaking with Renji jolted him so soundly that Aizen looked up questioningly at him.

"Are you all right, my love?"

"Y-yes," he said shakenly, "I am just...weary."

"Yes, this condition does seem to wear on you. It is likely that your male body is still adjusting to carrying new life. Try to relax, Byakuya. I will take care of you."

"Thank you, my lord. That is a great comfort," he said woodenly.

_Or..._

_Or maybe the king was already dead. But Aizen obviously wanted a legitimate heir to be born. I wonder why. Why would a usurper bother with his predecessor's consort and child?_

_But is this even the former king's chid?_

_If Aizen had not yet killed the king, and it was the king who sent me to Renji...why would he do that? For, in truth, though it would seem a kindness, it would not help me to accept my situation any more easily. In fact, I must admit, it only seemed more painful going back and being teased with that lost dream. It would have been kinder to allow me to return to end things properly...but whichever sent me back, king or usuper, wanted me to sleep with Renji. The true king would have no motivation to do that._

_But...Aizen?_

_Why would Aizen want me to sleep with Renji?_

The thought that reached him, struck his mind so soundly that he gasped in surprise, then sat up in shock. He reeled in shock as Aizen sat up next to him, curling an arm around him and speaking to him soothingly.

"There now, it was only a dream," he assured the noble, sending a hard chill down Byakuya's spine.

It was everything he could do not to shiver under Aizen's hands as the traitor gently caressed his hair, then slid a hand down under his yukata and rubbed his abdomen gently.

_No, the rightful king would never have sent me back to sleep with Renji. But...if Renji was...if Renji could be...?_

He thought back to his arrival after his defeat at the hands of As Nodt...how he had been healed and taken before the king, how he had been welcomed by the royal family and how the king had revealed that he had been called, not to be healed and sent back to fight, but to become King's Consort.

_Kami! How much of what I saw, how many of the people I have met here...are illusions? I am grateful, of course, that the king's prism allowed me to see through the illusions, but what can I do? I don't know who to go to...who to trust...who will even believe me! And even if my suspicions about Renji are true. Even if he was an heir in the direct line of descent, Renji is dead. The only one here who might understand and believe me is Rukia, but I dare not betray her to Aizen. If he thinks we are on to him..._

_But that is really why she was brought here, ne? He knows that I would do anything to protect her. He is counting on that to keep me from acting, even if I did learn the truth!_

_What do I do?_

_Who can I go to?_

_Gods, I don't know what to do!_

Fresh pangs of loneliness and despair made him ache painfully inside, even as Aizen's hands continue to rub his abdomen, then to slide down further to begin a seduction. He couldn't change expression, couldn't stiffen, nor say a word to stop what was happening.

_If he has any reason to suspect, then he will..._

_What will he do?_

_Why is he doing this? Even if Renji was an heir and this child is legitimate royal offspring, why would Aizen need the child? What, by all that's holy is he planning?_

_I need to somehow find out what that man is going to do, and I have to stop him! If not for myself and for the three worlds, then for Renji and this miracle we made together._

Tears came to his eyes as he struggled to accept what must be the truth, and he barely felt Aizen begin to prepare him. He closed his heart to what was happening, and cooperated quietly, looking up into Aizen's eyes, but not seeing anymore as he let the truth protect him from what was happening.

_This is our baby, Renji's and mine. And Renji was the rightful king of this land! This means that our son is to be the next king._

He sank further into the beauty of that thought, forcing away the reality of Aizen Sousuke, caressing his body, speaking softly into his ear and smiling as he stole the privilege of joining sexually with the king's consort. He burned inside with rage, but kept himself carefully composed, unable to speak, for fear of giving himself away as Aizen's hands parted his thighs and the usurper moved into position to take him. Byakuya closed his eyes then and tried not to feel that sense of invasion, the feelings of being betrayed and all alone in his predicament. He managed well until Aizen's movements atop his body conjured a memory of his lovemaking with Renji. Fresh tears leaked onto his face, but Aizen's eyes had closed, and his hips thrust relentlessly into Byakuya's shaken form.

_Renji..._

_If only this hadn't happened. If only we had learned in time, who you were and how to stop this man! You would still be alive and we could fight this battle together. I don't know how I will face this alone, but I will do what I have to do...for you, Renji...for us._

_For the family we made that one day we had!_

_Renji, I wish you could hear me._

_Renji! Please hear me!_

_Renji!_

And suddenly...inconceivably, he felt Renji's mind brush against his.

_Renji, _his mind screamed blindly, _Renji, for the love of kami, save us!_

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji followed Tetsuya into the archive, his mind still spinning with questions.

"Tetsuya, what are we going to do? Now that we've done more investigating, it's pretty clear that someone forced Byakuya to leave, for some reason...and that person took Rukia also, and they tried to kill me! We need to find out who took them and where they are, before something really bad happens!"

"We will," the noble assured him, "But Renji, we need to make sure that we are up to whatever the situation calls for. I have people working on the problem, even now. While they search for some lead, you must rest."

He led the redhead into a small recess, where Renji found a closet containing a few comfortable looking yukatas. He took one and and changed, then climbed into the bed as Tetsuya returned with a cup of hot green tea.

"Try to get some sleep now, Renji. I promise you, as soon as word comes that anything has been discovered that might help us, I will wake you."

He turned and started for the doorway.

"Hey, uh, Tetsuya?"

"Yes, Renji."

"Maybe you shouldn't leave the archive tonight either," the redhead said, an edge of worry in his voice, "I mean, you and I are the only ones here who know that something shady is going on. We should probably look out for each other."

Tetsuya smiled warmly.

"Actually, I was thinking the same thing, Renji," he answered, "So, I will be sleeping in the next room. Do not worry. No one can enter the archive, except for me, those with my permission, and members of the royal family. We are safe here."

"Good," Renji sighed, "Tetsuya, I don't know what I'd be able to do if I was alone in all of this. I'm really glad that you have my back. Thank you."

"I am trying to find my cousin," Tetsuya answered quietly, "But even though I do not remember either of you right now, I see what kind of man you are, and I understand why my cousin would love you. It is obvious to me that you are very much devoted to him. Not everyone finds that kind of love, Renji. I myself am still seeking it. But while we search, it is good that we have each other to depend on...especially in times like these, when things have gone so awry. Sleep now, Renji. Rest. I have received word that we will be allowed to visit Sousuke Aizen tomorrow. I think that we shall find some much needed answers then."

"Yeah," Renji said hopefully, "Good night, Tetsuya."

"Good night, Renji."

Renji watched as the noble left the room, then took a few sips of the soothing tea and laid down. And surprisingly, although his mind still burned with questions, he managed to drift off. His mind wandered, even in sleep, remembering that day with Byakuya, their intense, beautiful lovemaking and the terror he had felt upon waking to find the cottage in flames.

_There must be a reason...both why whoever has Byakuya allowed him to come back for that day and why he tried to kill me afterward. Shit, it's like he wanted us to go to bed together! But why do that? And why do that, then try to kill me? This isn't making any sense..._

_He focused on Byakuya, and his mind drifted further into sleep. And as he slept, Renji felt his soul gently lifted and carried upward. He knew immediately, that the place he was carried into was special...and familiar._

_"That's right," he whispered, "The royal realm. Ichigo and I went there. That's where we were healed and we fought the asauchi to reforge our broken bankais."_

_He floated on the memories, remembering how he had looked up to the giant coccoon-like structure that he had been told was the soul king's residence. Then suddenly, inexplicably, he heard someone calling his name._

_"Renji!"_

_The voice was heartbreakingly familiar and sounded unnaturally desperate. In fact, he had never heard Byakuya sound so desperate._

_"Byakuya!" he called back, squinting up at the king's palace, "Byakuya, where are you?"_

_"Renji, please hear me!"_

_"I hear you! Where are you, Byakuya?"_

_"Renji! Renji, for the love of kami, save us!"_

_"Byakuya!"_

Renji sat up suddenly, shaking and panting, sweat rolling in beads down his face. The door opened and Tetsuya flash stepped into the room, still dressed in his nightclothes, and wearing a spooked expression.

"Renji, are you all right?" he asked nervously, "Did something happen? You were screaming Byakuya's name."

"I...I was?" Renji asked, blinking as he struggled to remember.

Tetsuya moved across the room and made a fresh cup of tea for each of them, then returned to Renji's side.

"It's so weird," the redhead confessed, "I was dreaming about how after the battle where Byakuya supposedly died, Ichigo and I and Rukia were all taken to the royal realm, where we were healed. While I was there, I remember looking up at the king's palace. Well, in my dream, I was back there and looking up at the palace, just like before. But something was different this time, Tetsuya. Something was wrong!"

"What? What was it?" Tetsuya asked, sitting down in the chair beside the bed and handing Renji his tea.

"Ah...I, uh...heard his voice...Byakuya's voice. He was up in the king's palace and he was calling to me. Tetsuya, his voice sounded so desperate! Byakuya never sounded like that, not even in that last battle we had! I tried to call back to him and I was looking for a way to get to him, But he just cried out over and over for me to come and rescue them!"

Tetsuya's eyes widened and he stared back at Renji in surprise.

"Them?" he asked, watching as the word struck Renji soundly.

He caught his breath and his heart started to pound.

"Do you think that he meant that in your dream, the royal family was in danger? It is, after all, our duty to watch over the king and his family."

"N-no, there was something...something inside me that told me something different. Tetsuya, I don't know what's going on. Maybe he was talking about Rukia, but it felt different inside, even more so than that. And I feel it so strongly. Tetsuya, we have got to find him quickly!"

"We will," Tetsuya said bracingly, "I promise you. But while we wait for information that will lead us to him, I can at least help you to be able to discern which of your dreams are just dream and what things might be real."

"Wh-what? You mean, he might really have been trying to call out to me while I was asleep...and I _heard_ him?"

Tetsuya smiled.

"It is something that happens when we Kuchiki's bind with another soul during lovemaking. His mind is bound to yours. And even though you cannot speak directly to him, you could try in your dream to send him your thoughts. But lie down now. Lie down and focus on him. Think only of him as you fall asleep, and open your mind to let him answer you."

"This is crazy," Renji muttered. lying back down, "And how am I going to sleep now?"

Tetsuya looked at him in amusement and sent a soft jolt of kido through him, sending him off into sleep instantly.

"That should help you," he said quietly, remaining at the redhead's side as he slept, "And I will remain to stand guard over you and listen to any words you say, so that we will know..."

Renji sank down into sleep, aided by Tetsuya's gentle spell. He focused on Byakuya and felt an answering feeling of reaching in return. Renji clung to the small connection and once again heard Byakuya's voice call out to him.

_Byakuya, _he thought, sending a strong, bracing sensation of love through the connection, _I'm here. I heard you. And Tetsuya and I are coming for you._

Far away in the spirit dimension, Byakuya sat up in bed, his heart pounding in his chest and Renji's voice still ringing in his ears.

_Sweet kami! _

_Renji...is alive!_


End file.
